A Baby for the Daddy: Boys of Rockford Series Read online

  I sighed, shaking my head. “It’s a long story…”

  “Does it look like I’m going anywhere?” he griped, holding up his hand full of tubes and wires.

  I made a face, but he had a point. I came here because we needed to have this talk, and I knew I shouldn’t leave until we did.

  “Fine… I don’t know if it’s going to be an answer you’ll like, but it’s what I’ve got.”

  “I’m listening,” he said, gruffer than ever. I shook off the shiver, trying to ignore my body’s instinctual reaction to the one and only man I’d ever been with. It had been a long time since I’d seen any action, and I knew this was not the guy to get involved with again but telling that to my body was a challenge.

  “Well… You remember how strict my parents were, right?” I said ‘were’ because they’d improved over the years. My dad was a preacher though, probably would be until he couldn’t stand behind the pulpit anymore. And being a preacher’s daughter meant there were certain expectations of you. Specifically, certain behavioral expectations. Like the expectation that you wouldn’t go out dating the bad boy in school behind your parents’ backs. Or the expectation that you wouldn’t let him feel you up in the back of his older brother’s car.

  …Or that you wouldn’t let him take it much much further, winding up pregnant with his baby at fifteen.

  There were a lot of expectations, and I failed to meet up to every one of them when it came to Knight.

  “Hard to forget,” he said, fighting a smile. There were too many times he and Daddy got into it over me. Knight always had a big head on his shoulders and Daddy only ever saw him as a boy. A boy with no discipline, at that. Nowhere near good enough for his little princess.

  Of course, that only ever made me want him more. Every time Knight fought with my dad, I’d sneak out and do all the things he was so damned worried about. Knight loved it, of course. Except for when it went too far. When he found me crying after a harsh lecture from my father and he wanted to kick his ass.

  Or try to. I wasn’t sure a fifteen-year-old Knight could manage it back then, but the sentiment had warmed my heart as much as it had terrified me. Mostly because I believed he’d actually do it and one or both of them would end up in the hospital or jail.

  Luckily it never came to that, but probably only because of Cal.

  “I found out I was pregnant at doctor’s appointment. With my mom in the room. That’s how she found out we’d been having sex.”

  “Shit,” he whispered. I felt somewhat vindicated after that.

  “Yeah. So as soon as she told my dad, they concocted this whole plan to move to Fairview and pretend I wasn’t underage and my fiancé died in a car accident or something. I don’t know what story they told people because the lies didn’t last long. They couldn’t really keep it up. As much as they wanted to maintain their appearances, lying just isn’t natural to them. But they chilled out a lot once Cal was born. They went into full grandparent mode,” I added with a little smile. It was true that they’d became so much more fun to be around since I became a mother. It was like they saw me as a peer finally. Once I had my own place and I was supporting the two of us — it took me until I was about seventeen to manage it, but I worked instead of going to school — they seemed to forgive a lot of my past transgressions.

  I glanced over at Knight and the smile I had disappeared. He was not at all amused about any of this.

  “That still doesn’t say why you didn’t tell me,” he said, the fire blazing in his eyes that I’d forgotten about. I’d forgotten how intense his eyes could get. How mesmerizing they were.

  I shook my head, trying to snap out of it, but I still was not able to give him an adequate answer. “I wanted to at first, and my parents wouldn’t let me. They had me on lockdown, I couldn’t call or text or email… Eventually I realized they were serious. They were going to make me live in this new place and start all over… I tried to just deal with that for a while, and the pregnancy was hard, so I told myself I’d tell you when he was born. When I was sure everything was going to be okay. I didn’t want to start the huge fight with my parents only for something to happen to the baby and… Anyway… After Cal was born, it just seemed like I should have told you sooner. And then the more time that went by, the harder it seemed to pick up the phone. I don’t know, Knight… I’m sorry, I know I should have told you sooner.”

  Tears streamed down my face before I even managed to finish telling him everything. It was such a huge weight off me to finally share all of it with him, but he didn’t look sympathetic at all. He glared at me, everything about his posture and expression was hostile. If I’d hoped to find camaraderie, it wasn’t going to happen here.

  I swiped at my tears, sniffling, shaking my head. “I’m sorry… I’ll just… I’ll go,” I muttered, shoving the chair back as I stood and headed for the door, feeling like a fool for ever hoping it would go differently.

  5

  Knight

  “Wait,” I called as she headed to the door, hips made for sin swaying when she walked. Fucking Tenley. I couldn’t believe it was really her. I couldn’t believe everything she’d said to me.

  Part of me was fucking furious. I wanted to lay into her and tell her just how shitty I thought it was what she did to me and my kid.

  My damn kid.

  That was going to take some time to wrap my head around.

  But shit, how mad could I really be at her? I knew I was a fuck-up. I’d always been a fuck-up and even more so when I was just fifteen and Tenley really knew me. I couldn’t say I blamed her for keeping it all a secret, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt like a motherfucker.

  She froze in place, and it felt like we were both holding our breath. I didn’t know how to act around her after all this time. It was like seeing a ghost or something. She was someone I’d made peace with never seeing again a long, long time ago.

  But there she was. In the flesh. In my hospital room, telling me we had a kid together.

  It almost seemed like there was something bigger than the two of us nudging us back together. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking since Tenley’s the only girl I’ve ever really been hung up on — and the only one I never got over.

  “Sit down,” I whispered, my voice much gentler. “Tell me about him. About our son.”

  Tenley gave me a curious look, her head tilted to one side like she was trying to read through me. Finally, she made her way back to the chair she’d just left and sat down slowly, her jeans molding to her thighs. I licked my lips just looking at her. She’d grown up, for sure. Those curves she had now were all woman, no budding femininity here. And I liked it. Tenley Alexander was why the word MILF even existed.

  But when she sat there, just smiling softly to herself, likely trying to decide where to start, it wasn’t sex I was thinking about with Tenley. It was how damn sweet she looked. How that smile of hers looked sadder than I remembered, and I wanted to kiss that sadness right out of her.

  “Well,” she said with a chuckle, “he’s exactly like his father, for one thing. Hard-headed, stubborn, doesn’t think rules apply to him…”

  “That’s my boy,” I said with a grin that she didn’t return.

  “I named him Calhoun Alexander after us both,” she said, my heart warming at that thought. Even though she kept him a secret from me and never let me meet him, he carried a little part of me with him. And that meant she wasn’t just trying to forget me when she left. Maybe there was some truth to her story about her parents and them forcing her away. I remembered them being strict, but that was something out of a movie, forcing their daughter into seclusion to have her out-of-wedlock baby. What century were they living in?

  It made me mad thinking about it, but that probably meant it was a good thing I was finding out about it a dozen years later. I couldn’t even fathom the senseless things I might have tried to do as a teenager if I knew they were the reason Tenley and I were kept apart.

  “I like it,”
I said, my hand itching to reach out to her, thinking about all the things she must have done without me. It was her own damn fault for not including me in all those things, but I knew it couldn’t have been easy to do it alone.

  “He’s rowdy and rambunctious, full of energy and completely exhausting. He’s been asking about his dad ever since he could talk.”

  “And what did you tell him?” I asked.

  She shrugged, biting her lip, her teeth dragging over it, making it redder, making me wilder. “Enough that he managed to track you down, apparently.”

  “But not enough he didn’t feel like he had to,” I countered.

  She sighed, shaking her head. “Now that he’s met you, there’s no getting around it. He’s going to want to see you all the time.”

  “So?” I asked. “I want to get to know him too.”

  Her head snapped up, eyes searching mine. “You mean it?”

  “Of course,” I said, not sure whether out of sincerity or just to prove everyone wrong who seemed so damn surprised.

  Her eyes darted to the door, then back to me. “Well… It is summer break. If you’re serious about it, I might be able to find a place closer to Rockford for a couple of months to make things easier.”

  My heart stopped for a moment at the thought of Tenley moving back to town. Tenley being close enough to come over whenever she wanted to, without us having to sneak around from adults.

  I knew she was offering for Cal, not for me, but I couldn’t tell that to my dick which was already getting excited at the prospect.

  “Yeah, that would be—” Before I got all the words out, my brother came barging into the room wearing a tux, Lexi trailing behind him in her wedding dress.

  Shit. That was today. I’d lost an entire day in the hospital and now I realized why Bear had sounded so unbelievably angry at me on the phone. I missed his wedding. And I made him come out here when he should have been having fun.

  Bear just shook his head after one look at me, tossing a change of clothes on my lap. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen me after it looked like I had a fight with a tiger. Probably wouldn’t be the last either, knowing me.

  “Shit, I’m sorry—” I said, trying to apologize for missing the wedding, but I can tell he was not in the mood.

  “I brought your clothes and I’m here to take you home, but I don’t want to talk to you.”

  I sighed. I deserved that. Especially seeing his pretty new wife clinging to him.

  I tried to casually slide my eyes over to Tenley, trying to get Bear to notice her, and it took him too damn long. When he finally did, he did a double-take.

  “Holy hell. Talk about a blast from the past,” he said, eyes wide.

  Lexi was a little more tactful, smiling at Tenley, making small talk about how long it had been since they’d seen each other, that kind of thing. I didn’t think that Lexi and Tenley ever really knew each other, but I guess in a town as small as Rockford, with only one high school, we all sort of knew each other in a way.

  “The nurses said you’re all good to go after you sign out,” Bear said, clearly impatient to get me out of the hospital and get on with his honeymoon. Which I appreciated. I also wanted to get the hell out of the hospital.

  I looked over to Tenley, not sure what to say.

  “We should get together sometime,” she said, her perfectly straight white teeth nibbling her bottom lip again. “To… discuss things.”

  I nodded. “How about tomorrow? Mimi’s. Eight?”

  She looked thoughtful for a moment, then nodded. “Sounds good.”

  There were butterflies in my stomach as she walked out. Honest-to-fucking-goodness butterflies.

  I wriggled into pants under the blankets for Lexi’s sake, and pressed the buzzer for the nurse — only once this time — for help getting out of all these machines and shit to put a shirt on. Bear was making a face at me while I waited, and I couldn’t just sit there and wonder what it was about.

  “What?”

  “What do you need to discuss?”

  I saw the nurse coming in from a few feet away, and it seemed like the perfect distraction to keep him from harping on it. “I’ve got a kid,” I said, just as the nurse came in.

  Sure enough, Bear stood speechless, staring at me like a magic trick he couldn’t explain. At least that got a chuckle out of me. Nothing else in that awful day had been funny at all, but my big brother’s face in that moment was priceless.

  Too bad reality wasn’t nearly as amusing.

  6

  Tenley

  After I left the hospital, I took Cal straight back home and set to work finding a place in Rockford for us to stay for the summer. My work with the ministry could be done remotely, and since he wasn’t in school, it wouldn’t matter for him either. It was surprisingly easy to find a place to sublease for the couple of months. A family was going on an extended vacation and wanted to know their house was in good hands while they were gone. The place would be completely furnished so we’d only need to pack necessities, and I held my breath while I waited for the reply.

  My email got a phone call response an hour later and the lady and I chatted for a little while, getting to know each other so the whole thing wasn’t so weird. I explained to her a bit of the situation, trying to be closer to my kid’s dad for the summer, and she thought that was the sweetest thing ever.

  Before I knew it, it was a done deal.

  Telling Cal all about it?

  Well, that was an adventure. His excitement could hardly be contained. I thought to myself more than a couple of times that this might be too much too fast, too crazy, trusting Knight too much, but if it didn’t work out, I could always come back. My place here would still be waiting for me. With that in mind, we packed suitcases and toys and games, things he thought for sure Knight would love to look at like his favorite action figure or a trophy he got from school.

  You better not let me down, Knight, I thought bitterly, looking at the excitement in my kid’s eyes. Those eyes that were so similar to his father’s. I saw Knight every time I looked at Cal and a part of me always hurt. It was like a wound that had never fully healed because it got picked at every single day. Cal deserved a good relationship with his dad, I just hoped his dad could live up to his expectations.

  I knew I should probably temper those expectations as well as I could.

  On the drive to Rockford to move into our new place, I broached the subject.

  “So, Cal, you know your dad’s never been a dad before, right?”

  He looked at me like that was a very strange thing to say. Maybe it was. I didn’t know how to word all of this. How to explain the way Knight was without talking down on him and forcing my kid to take sides before he had a chance to make up his own mind.

  That was something I never wanted to do. I didn’t want to be one of those single parents that talked shit about the other parent whenever they weren’t around. I didn’t want my kid to have any animosity toward his dad. Kids don’t need to worry about adult drama and too many parents force that on them. Not me. Not if I could help it.

  But it was my responsibility as a loving mother to prepare my baby for the heartbreak he might encounter.

  “So?” Cal said, brows furrowed so much like Knight’s it’s freaking ridiculous.

  I let out a heavy breath. “So, he might not be very good at it for a while. It’s the kind of thing that takes a lot of practice and a lot of dads get that out of the way when their kids are still babies and won’t remember it.”

  “I’m not a baby,” he said.

  “I know, and that’s my point. Your dad might not be great at all this parenting stuff, so I don’t want you to be disappointed if he doesn’t know what to do or how to act…”

  “Mom, you worry too much,” Cal said, turning to look out the window thoughtfully.

  “Or maybe I worry the exact right amount,” I said, teasing him with a tickle to his ribs. He squirmed away swatting at me, nearly too old for this
kind of horseplay with his old mom any more.

  “Nah, I think it’s too much,” he said.

  I stuck my tongue out at him. “That’s what I think of that.”

  We pulled up outside of our temporary home and it wasn’t much different than our other place. Just a normal house, filled with family pictures that weren’t ours, and a kitchen layout that was going to take some getting used to. Cal ran right upstairs to find the bedroom that was going to be his.

  “Mom! They’ve got a Switch!” he cried excitedly. I was pretty sure that was the video game thing he’d been asking me to buy for almost a year, but the thing was so hard to find, and also half a rent payment. But if he got to play with one here, I’d probably never escape it now.

  Unless it was awful. I guess I could hope for that.

  There wasn’t a lot to unpack, and it was weird to have ‘moved’ in a day, having a new house completely devoid of boxes by the end of it. It was strange being in someone else’s house, too, but not as strange as I expected it to be. I was already starting to feel at home, relaxing on the big overstuffed chaise lounge when I realized I should probably be getting dressed for my dinner with Knight.

  I was putting on makeup in the bathroom when Cal came out of his room, eying me suspiciously.

  “Are you going somewhere?”

  “Yep,” I said.

  “Where?”

  “I don’t have to tell you,” I teased, but he just pouted, and I sighed, knowing I was going to give in.

  “I’m meeting your dad for dinner to talk about how we’re going to handle all of this.”

  His eyes went wide, face bright and hopeful. “Can I come?”

  I gave him a sympathetic look. “Not this time, bud. We need to talk about some private stuff. But there will be plenty of time for you to spend time with him, I promise.”

  He huffed and stomped back into his room, back to his video games.